Monday, July 21, 2008

Cheapness And Its Ramifications



So get this, my buddy bet on the Celtics to win the NBA Title this year. Obviously, that was the correct outcome to wager on. Even better, he placed the bet BEFORE the Celtics acquired Kevin Garnett.

The odds he got.....(drum roll)......

275 to 1!!!

This friend of mine emptied his wallet for this dreamy speculation (he's a diehard, born-and-raised, Celts fan).

Too bad he only had a fin left.

$5 times 275 is still $1,375.

AND, he got to enjoy the his team's victorious season.

But still, another two bucks or so would have paid off handsomely.....didn't he have any loose change?

This story reminds me of what another one of my buddies did at a golf tournament in Wildwood, New Jersey.

This was a four day event. But each day they had "closest to the pin" on the short par 3s. For five bucks you could choose to enter. I would venture to guess that at least half of the 256 guys anted up every time they reached these holes - probably more than half. So there's $600 or more up for grabs. This buddy of mine, a 7 or 8 handicap, contemplated his chances of stiffing the pin and decided to save his precious $5.

Sure enough, he knocked it 10 inches and would have won the pot.

The next day, faced with the same decision, "To ante or not to ante", NumbNuts figured there was no way he could out-play all 255 golfers on this same particular shot - EVEN though he had just done it the prior round. So he went "short-armed" again and left the same $5 bill in his pocket.

He hit it 10 inches from the hole, yet again!

He's not just a Moron; he's a Butthole.

His theoretical/potential loss of at least $1,200 is realy quite beside the point.

The consequence of his Moronic actions is that the rest of us shmucks, with his tale indelibly etched in our psyches, will forever keep anteing up for these $5 donations!

Think the guy pictured below would ever pass up a $5 bet?



He'd be on the tee asking the 70 year-old women collecting the dough if he could put down $50 and get odds on his tee shot!

By the way, how funny is it that in searching for images of the Caesar's Palace SportsBook, that pic of the unrepentant Pete Rose came right up?

1 comment:

Tom. said...

you could also talk about how they are too cheap to spell the sign correctly - now THAT'S cheap!