Sunday, January 17, 2010
Accosting and Altercating
So, I had at it with my Moronic landlord again yesterday.
He accosted my wife as she was getting out of the car, asking her *if she intended on paying the rent*. The guy is a real man, let me tell ya; he sees me all the time but won't dare accost me! No, he goes after my lovely, somewhat less volcanic wife.
Now I was inside at the time but saw the whole thing develop. I ran out, interceded right away, and screamed at the SOB to *stop harassing us*.
Dummy - I'm not harassing you. I just want to know if you're going to pay the rent.
CaptiousNut - STOP HARASSING US!
And I quickly sent my wife and kids into the house.
Dummy - I want the rent check.
Then I started to laugh...
CaptiousNut - Do YOU pay all your bills???
Recall this scam artist owes well over $4,000,000 to home lenders, credit card companies, utilities, contractors (a couple of whom I've seen come looking to pound it out of him!), lawyers, architects, and God knows who else.
I whipped out my camera and started recording...
CaptiousNut - STOP HARASSING US!
And I walked into the doorstep; he followed a bit, hollering and gesticulating as he's done before:
Dummy - THIS IS MY PROPERTY!
He paused, got into his (new?) beat-up truck - which ironically set off the car alarm! - called me *crazy*, and said:
Dummy - If you don't pay,....I'm just going to have to take legal action.
CaptiousNut - Hah! Go ahead. Make sure you know all the laws first.
About an hour later I received a phone call from someone who claimed to be the knucklehead's lawyer.
Attorney - Hi, I'm [so and so], [idiot's] attorney.
CaptiousNut - Go ahead.
Attorney - He wants to know if you're going to pay the January rent.
CaptiousNut - I'm LISTENING.
Attorney - Again, he wants his money
CaptiousNut - HIS MONEY?
Attorney - Well, there are legal procedures for these matters.
Then he mumbled something about *if you want to go down that road...* and he had me REAL SCARED.
Pretty much that ended the phone call, except that I got one zinger in at the end:
CaptiousNut - [laughing] Make sure you get paid up front!
Later that afternoon I was put into contact with a possible lawyer for myself. At this point, I just want a restraining order against the Moron. I want him to be told by the authorities that he can't badger us in any way shape or form - no matter whether what our *paid rent* situation. That might cost somewhere between $500 and $1,000 - which is way more than I want to spend. Will meet more formally with the lawyer on Tuesday.
My wife laughed for a good 10 minutes at my line *do you pay all your bills?* - a line that I cultivated and rehearsed for such an altercation. It's profoundly ironic that this guy, who NEVER pays his bills, can feel so entitled to our rent. I mean, if HE were us, he wouldn't pay either; and probably would have stopped paying ages ago!
What's driving him at least as crazy as the lost $2,500 this month is the fact that we won't tell him anything - like are we moving out, are we going to pay in February, etc. That's a deliberate tack on my part because the scumbag doesn't deserve even that much. Plus, he can't start an eviction process for like 30 days; and it's not even worth his time (or fees) to pursue such a matter without several months of delinquency. Meanwhile, his remaining credit and funds are drying up, his *necessity* bills (like food, gas, and whatnot) have to be mounting, all as he approaches the end of his rope.