Saturday, January 30, 2010
Aging - A Downhill Death Spiral
So I had lunch yesterday with an old (going back to HS) friend of mine.
His wife is due any minute with their second child.
My 35 year-old buddy nonchalantly mentioned that he had a *consult* scheduled in two weeks.
A *consult*? What the bleep does that mean? A divorce lawyer or something?
I forget how he articulated it, but think he said or gestured *snip, snip* or something to that effect.
Are you freakin' kidding me? We were eating lunch for crying out loud!
First off, I told him that he'll *lose 15 yards off the tee* automatically, perhaps 20.
Secondly, is he out of his mind? Why can't SHE have the operation?
I was in complete and utter disbelief. What about those Commandments:
Accept children lovingly from God.
Hit'em LONG and straight.
Exactly how freakin' old am I getting?
My hair is lightening in some spots and I have nasty varicose veins popping out. I'm turning into my father in terms of wardrobe and wandering around the house all night investigating *sounds*. Last year I went to my first 40th birthday party. I wintered in Florida last year. Et cetera.
I've known this friend of mine since puberty, since the thing just started to function!!! And now he's ready to voluntarily *disarm*?
I'd never, ever get a vasectomy. Especially not now with those high end sperm banks offering me $1,000 for deposits. (I'm holding out for 5k, per.)
Maybe this will change his mind:
I've also heard of wives who make their husbands get snipped on account of their philandering suspicions.
That I simply don't get. Wouldn't it just embolden a *hound* to be less careful?
Try as I might, I don't think I'm ever going to understand the mindset and ways of earthlings.