Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Lyrics Now Matter



Most people can listen to songs for years upon years without ever knowing the actual lyrics they are mumbling. I am almost one of those people. And I was always amazed whenever I saw someone clearly singing all the words to a pop song. How the heck could they decipher the screaming?

There simply was no easy way to ascertain what those drugged-up, eating-disordered singers were saying - until the internet. Now you can google songs, partial lyrics, and even find the full audio on youtube for almost every extant song.

I heard the recent hit of that pop diva Pink on the radio I don't know how many times before I figured out what she was saying. The chorus is "...It's you and your hand tonight"!

Alright, maybe more context is needed. Here are the full lyrics:

U + Ur Hand lyrics

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Check it out
Going out
On the late night
Looking tight
Feeling nice
It's a cock fight
I can tell
I just know
That it's going down
Tonight
At the door we don't wait cause we know them
At the bar six shots just beginning
That's when dick head put his hands on me
But you see

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight


Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh

Midnight
I'm drunk
I don't give a ***k
Wanna dance
By myself
Guess you're outta luck
Don't touch
Back up
I'm not the one
Buh bye
Listen up it's just not happening
You can say what you want to your boyfriends
Just let me have my fun tonight
Aiight

I'm not here for your entertainment
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight


Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh oh
Break break
Break it down

In the corner with your boys you bet 'em five bucks
You'd get the girl that just walked in but she thinks you suck
We didn't get all dressed up just for you to see
So quit spilling your drinks on me yeah

You know who you are
High fivin, talking sh*t, but you're going home alone arentcha?

Cause I'm not here for your entertainment
No
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
Just stop and take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight
It's just you and your hand


I'm not here for your entertainment
No no no
You don't really want to mess with me tonight
Just stop and take a second
Just take a second
I was fine before you walked into my life
Cause you know it's over
Before it began
Keep your drink just give me the money
It's just you and your hand tonight

Yeah oh


So why am I posting on this small beer?

Well, I play these songs on youtube for my kids to dance to behind me while I try to work. I just happened to glance up at the window and see a very funny comment under the video on youtube.



I couldn't believe it. At first I thought it was sarcasm. Pink IS a whore! Look at what she wears doesn't wear during performances.







What a darned shame that some 13 year old girl commenting on youtube really thinks telling a guy to give you $3 bucks instead of a drink and to go home and auto-gratify is what separates ladies from "whores". What type of positive female role model prances around in tramp attire, peppering her songs with "dick head" and "cock fight"?

This youtube comment would graduate from funny to hilarious if it wasn't so tragic.

How can I possibly shield my little girl from at least the fashion standards of these role models - no less everything else?

Now I have bought many random girls drinks at the bars. I thought I had received the full gamut of responses right down to this one girl who looked at me and fell out of her bar stool laughing upon my proposal. (This was at Dicken's Inn in Philly. She was probably 40 and I was 19. I had to look not a day older than 15 at the time.)

But never has a girl turned down my offer, suggested I simply pay her, and then go home and touch myself. Unfortunately for the stags out there, this response has now been normalized through song.

I see that Pink is from Doylestown, PA. I remember, more than a few times, me buying random girls from Doylestown drinks. They used to come down to Philly all the time to escape the boredom of suburbia. Could I have bought her one back in the day?

Suburban girls are always the easiest to approach in almost every city bar. I sincerely doubt Pink was turning down drinks so rudely back when she was just known as Alecia Beth Moore.

Pink maybe able to turn out some fun songs (ignoring the lyrics), but she is a piece of garbage.

Maybe the message is dress like a whore and talk like a whore BUT get really pissed if anyone MIGHT think you are one?

I don't know.

Regardless, tarting yourself up for money is the very essence of being a whore.

If you saw a girl dressed like Pink out on the town are you supposed to think, "Hey, that's the type of girl I would like to take to the opera or maybe have a deep geo-political discussion with..."

????

5 comments:

Taylor Conant said...

I fall into the camp of mostly not being able to understand the lyrics of music I listen to. Not because I don't "get the message" but because I can't seem to focus these days on the lyrics over the background music. It's odd because when I was 13 or 14 I managed to memorize a couple full albums worth of lyrics from a few of my favorite bands at the time, and I can still sing along almost 100% through any of the songs from those albums when I hear them... but I try to do the same with some of the stuff I listen to these days and I mostly embarrass myself.

It's funny you mentioned the Pink song because this song got a lot of radio airplay last year and thus I heard it sometimes twice in one session while in the gym of my building. Despite my normal inability to decipher lyrics, this was one song that, after hearing a few times, I did HEAR what she was saying, even though I couldn't care to remember the lyrics to sing on my own (why would I? The song is garbage).

It's so funny to me to think of anyone approaching Pink and trying to buy her a drink, only to be rejected. She's so unattractive, with her lesbian-ish short cut man-hair, which is bleached into oblivion, her awful make-up and piercings and disgusting taste in personal clothing. Her body isn't very attractive either. Undoubtedly, as you mentioned, many people, women primarily, see a song like this as "empowering," but it not only reveals women to be nothing more than whores, it shows that many are cheap whores who aren't even willing to provide the services men are directly or indirectly paying for!

Pink is far from the first pop icon to objectify women's sexuality, however. Kelis's "Milkshake" hit was all about her breasts (a young female charge of mine was once shocked when I explained the meaning of the lyrics she was singing along to in my car), Christina Aguilera's "Candyman" song sounds like a perverted ode to a 40-year-old "cherrypop"-er, and so on and so on. Music has always been about love, romance and sex, but the latest musical fashions take the crudeness and lack of tact to a whole new level.

I feel bad for your kids that you made the mistake of letting them listen to this stuff. However, it's not too late to change it up... I recommend a solid diet of classic rock oldies from a variety of time periods and musical subgenres (Beatles, Eagles, Little River Band, Boston, the Cars, Roy Orbison, etc. etc. go all over the place) which will open their ears up to true musical talent and a message that, while often implictly sexual/romantic, is at least couched in a little bit of delayed-gratification.

As for taking one of these women to the opera or having a geo-political discussion... you're kidding, right?!

CaptiousNut said...

Beatles, Eagles, Little River Band, Boston, the Cars, Roy Orbison

????

That stuff is tired and dull. Listen to it for another ten years and it will start putting you to sleep.

Me and my kids will stick with Pink and American Idol contestants.

We just have to do "offsets" on account of the prurience.

How about, since you are a stag, you go out to a bar, offer a nubile woman a drink, then withdraw the offer, and tell her to go home and touch herself?

FWI, that is the type of stuff I would do if I was 21 today.

Taylor Conant said...

C,

Please, you make me laugh. Tired and dull?! That's what Pink's pop is after the 2nd spin. There hasn't been any "pop" worth listening to since Michael Jackson. The man may be a weird, child-molesting freak, but god damn it could he sing and dance. There's been so many failed attempts at being the new MJ (JT, Omarion, Ne-Yo) but no one can top the King of Pop and I doubt anyone ever will, even though I'd love to hear it.

In the meantime, Pink will be a nobody soon now, as her pop career will get run over by the next new year-long hit just like all those who came before her, and people with an apparent ear for talented song and music-writing (like me?) will continue to savor our favorite classics long past the twilight of our youth.

"Offsets," LOL. Reminds me, I owe you a rant about my public econ and economic development classes I just started right about now. First day of those two classes we covered pigouvian taxes/social optimums and various UN statistics and statistic gathering on poverty. I damn near shook my head off in disgust.

Oh and FYI I am a stag no longer... I met a wonderful young lady in Costa Rica who happens to be starting her grad studies in Connecticut and she came down to visit me last weekend. She's coming down again this weekend... and the next... and the next... so I'll undoubtedly run into nubile women at the bars but I'll probably refrain from advising them to go home and touch themselves, at least for the time being.

CaptiousNut said...

I just don't see what offering gratuitous advice to lonely women at bars has to do with the current apple of your eye.

Anyway, the two most hazardous things to extrapolate from are short-term trading profits and newfound romantic bliss.

I reserve the right to hold your comment against you 20 girlfriends from now.

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