Tuesday, January 24, 2012

I Will Ace Your Kid's SAT For $4,999


So the smart kid gets caught taking the SAT for dumb kids here on Long Island...

Most of y'all have probably heard this HORRIBLE story by now.

While most everyone I have run into thinks this kid is the nothing short of the devil....I happen to find the whole thing HILARIOUS - particularly his *punishment*:


He has heard the notion that deserving students are being left out of those colleges as a result of his fraud, but Eshaghoff is not buying it. “He really wasn’t displacing somebody … I feel confident defending the fact that [my clients] getting into the schools that they ended up getting into didn’t really affect other people,” he says. Eshaghoff regrets the shame his arrest caused his family and says if he could start over, he “never would have done it.” He will serve no jail time. Instead, under a plea deal, he will tutor low-income students on how to ace the exams he received so much money to take for others.

Hah! He has to tutor the dumb low-income students from the Boroughs!

Why are the parents so mad?

Because they spend boatloads of money on SAT prep - at least here in the NYC Metro area - so that their junior and their princess can maybe score 75 points higher and get into a slightly higher esteemed worthless college. And for that privilege they will end up exhausting all of their home equity just so their kid can major in political science, Spanish, or something equally useless like *environmental science* (like my poor niece).

The parents' anger is really, IMO, just poorly articulated, unconscious anger at the whole stinkin' process.

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