Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Seinfeld Covered It All

I spent this weekend in beautiful Newport, Rhode Island. Here's what happened a few minutes after we got there.

My wife and her mother had just taken the kids out of the room to go for a stroll. I just laid down on the bed with my book. Not 15 seconds after they left, I hear my wife trying to scan the key-card and get back into the room. She must of forgotten something.

I remembered the door was a little stubborn and I hear her unsuccessfully turning the knob. She can't get in. Maybe she was using the key-card for her mother's room? Maybe she is just being retarded? She knocks and I have to get up to open the door.

Now I am perturbed; she is always forgetting stuff; I had just started to relax after the long drive down. So I open the door if not furiously, at least with a clear growl and some woman, who's not my wife, is standing there half embarrassed and half scared. She stammers apologetically,

"Oh, I am so sorry. This isn't my room. I am on the wrong floor..."

Without batting an eyelash or mitigating my scowl, I snapped at her,

"I ordered an Asian girl."

The mortified woman couldn't run away fast enough.

You'll find this same joke by scrolling all the way to the end of this Seinfeld Episode.


Tax Shelter said...

did it ever cross your mind that she might be a robber, and thought everybody left?

CaptiousNut said...

No I didn't until you just threw it out there.

I have been watching "Masterminds" on the weekends. It's does documentary type profiles of successful prolific criminals. Almost all of them used disguises with more than a few being normal looking, well-dressed women. As you suggest (and I demonstrated) nobody would ever suspect them for crooks. They can always play the "wrong house" or "wrong door" excuse and get away with it.

The Owner said...

I just saw the episode on TV two weeks ago. Classic.

You think pretty quick on your feet to get that one off while she was still within earshot.