It's Tough...

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No Towels Back Then?

Okay, click this image to enlarge. It depicts someplace in Kabul, Afghanistan in 1970 and again *now*:

Clearly that must be all *Bush's fault* or something!

Tragically Bad Parents

A couple of these are pretty crass so I apologize upfront. What can I say? - I have to throw the groundlings in my audience a bone now and then!

Real Life Eco-Pagans!

Might be one of funniest, and most tragic, clips I have ever posted!

It's a slipperly slope you know - they all started out simply *recycling* aluminum cans and paper...

American Adoption = Receiving Stolen Goods

They say they secured their son, Lao Lu, with a padlock around his ankle because his four-year-old sister Ling was 'stolen' from them last month.

Child snatching is rife in China, where strict laws govern the size of families.

Hold up! People don't steal kids because family size is limited, Moron.

Here's the real story:

Chen said he could not afford to pay for childcare on his earnings of £4.50 a day and had refused offers of 'a lot of money' to give his son up for adoption.

"My wife cannot take care of him and I have to work to support my family. So I chain him to a pole when I have a fare.

"I don't even have a picture of my daughter to use for a missing-person poster. I cannot lose my son as well."

Hmmmm.....do y'all know anyone who'd pay *a lot of money* for a little Chinese girl?

I hate to break it to that guy, but his daughter IS NOT coming back.

However, in all likelihood she is doing fine. She's probably living in the NYC Metro area; she was probably sold for a cool 75k to some sterile couple who forfeited their youthful fertility for the lucre and ego of a *career*, or a *degree*.

I know it's probably wrong, but I assume the worst about every adopted Asian kid I see - particularly in the tony towns I spend most of my time in.

There are, of course, plenty of *non-white* Americans in need of adoption. But no, these still-selfish, would-be parents have to go on and subsidize kidnapping on another continent.

I submit that the padlocking *dad* most certainly IS NOT the a$$hole in this story.

If and when my wife and I adopt (she can't have any more kids), we both concur that we'll only look state-side.

Some Guys Have None Of The Luck

Ken Green, a 51 year-old professional golfer, is a little before my time (as a golfer) so I scarcely know who he is.

But last June he made the news as victim of a horrific car accident. He was driving a camper that veered off-road. Consequently, his girlfriend and brother were killed - and he lost his leg.

OUCH.

Then just the other day I heard that his son committed suicide in a college dorm.

DOUBLE OUCH.

Apparently Ken himself had some psychological problems of his own throughout his life.

How could anyone not feel bad for this poor guy?

And who in their right mind would ever sit next to him at a blackjack table? Or play golf with this unlucky fellow under cumulonimbus skies?

How would you like to see him seated next you on a flight?!

Clarifying Tragedy

Even though I make an all-out effort to avoid *contemporary* news, I did see the other day the wires abuzz with *Afghanistan fighting....10 US Soldiers Dead*.

As my South Philly jabronis would say, not for anything....but that ain't that sad, nor should it be deemed *news* in the sense of unexpectation.

Over that same time, I received word of a genuine tragedy:

The weekend death of a New Jersey finance executive, the second person in 13 months to die after falling from an escalator at the Pier Shops at Caesars, was ruled accidental yesterday by Atlantic County officials.

James Vellanti, 42, of Clinton, N.J., died early Sunday after falling more than 30 feet at the Pier, an Atlantic City mall connected to a casino by a sky bridge.

The poor guy was there for a weekend of golf and gambling with his buddies - one of my extended inlaws was actually among them and right there, barreling down the stairs in a futile attempt to somehow revive his friend.

This crap could befall any one of us, at any time despite being thousands of miles from a theater of war.

Not too long ago, every (late) night I used to turn the TV off, bury my face in the pillows, and think of my two passions: the Celtics and my golf game. This was my ritual and it always sent me snoozing in 15 seconds.

Nowadays, steps one and two haven't changed, BUT before I fall asleep each night I thank God for the roof over my head, the food in my belly, for my healthy and wonderful wife and kids, etc.

You rudderless, self-absorbed, single people out there can't possibly comprehend the mechanics my transformation - though one day, hopefully, you will.

Mr. Vellanti left a wife and three small children.

Not Funny

That was from the Chicage Tribune in 1934. We may as well re-run it today - 75 years hence!

Click to enlarge image.

Tale Of Two Floods

I just got an *email forward* with the above title, and consisting of the following two pics:

Canine Idolatry

Perusing the calendar for my town's *Recreation Center* I came across this:

Pooch Parties

Wednesday October 29th 7:30-9:00 PM 1 Night $30
Halloween Pooch Party-Events include: bobbing for tennis balls, best costume contest, beginners agility and of course tricks for treats

Wednesday November 19th 7:00-8:30 PM 1 Night $30
Thanksgiving Gobble Doggie Social-Events include, off leash playgroup, obedience command obstacle course, bar jump contests and musical doggie tunnels

Wednesday October 29th 7:00-8:30 PM 1 Night $30
Doggy Obstacle Course Night-Learn basic dog agility obstacles & run a course with your dog.

Wednesday December 17th 7:00-8:30 PM 1 Night $30
Jingle Bell Bark Holiday Party-Events include: canine contests (waggiest tail, best trick, dog owner look-a-like, best holiday outfit), agility games



There are three more events listed for canine idolators bringing the grand total to seven.

Meanwhile, there are only eleven scheduled items for the HUMAN CHILDREN of local property taxpayers!!!

The waggiest tail contest?

Are you sh*itting me???!!!

To read all my blogging on Deranged Dog People, click here.

Post-Summer Depression

I have to confess that I have been very glum the past couple of weeks. Temperatures here have been dropping into the 50s at night - as they do every year at the end of August.

You see, there's no fall (or spring) here in Beantown - or at least not one of any duration. Once the summer is over, we lose a lot of daylight, and the depressing reality of our 6 month winter comes to fore.

There's no embellishment here. The *changing seasons* here really get me down. Boats are getting pulled out of the water. The lifeguards are gone from the beach (and the bathrooms are locked shut). Heck, I've used my air conditioner but once in the past two weeks - and that was yesterday. Before you know it, we'll be flinching and wincing as we plop our hiney's down on cold toilet seats.

Alright this is the year I vow to make good on my annual threat to spend a couple of winter months in Naples!

The real problem with my pipe dream is leaving my wife up here. I'm not comfortable having her sleep in an empty house. If we had a dog I'd feel a whole lot better.

I wonder if Boston was the inspiration for this song...