Living In New York - One Year Review

This is the private neighborhood beach which is only a reachable par-5 away from our house:

Recall last May we were essentially evicted by our deadbeat, scumbag landlord from the house we were renting on Boston's beautiful South Shore.

And we, for a variety of reasons, decided to move to Long Island - into the house my wife grew up in AND co-habitate with her mother, my MIL.

Well the house is big (3,000 sq ft?) with a finished basement and a huge yard - BUT it's not that big!

My MIL moved out in January (while we were in Florida) to a retirement community. She needed her own space - and I'll leave it at that.

The reasons we moved here were mostly financial, i.e. the house. But also my wife got a raise to be transferred into this high rent district. On top of that I can potentially work (in the conventional sense) in NY whereas the economic opportunities were relatively very slim in Boston.

The other main reason for moving, one that I would never have seen coming a few years ago, is that New York is a much better place to homeschool. There's simply so much more going on; more people; more museums; and more opportunity to NOT STAND OUT. New Yorkers are busy as heck, moving in a million directions at once and don't give a hoot about this highly offensive thing we do in educating our own.

Lesser, but not to be minimized, reasons for moving include food and the NYC 4am *last call*!

So far, overall, everything has worked out great and almost just as I had imagined. We're a little busier than I prefer but otherwise at least three-quarters of the family are very happy here. My wife? Well her commute (all the way downtown, next to WTC) sucks and she also walked into a thoroughly incompetent department at work. Things are looking better though. She might start working out of mid-town; she cleaned out her staff - hiring her own people; and I'm on her to figure out, in 4-Hour Workweek fashion, how to squeeze more *working from home* days in.

If you had told me, not even 2 years ago, that I would move to Long Island and love it....I would have thought you were nuts. I hated this place: too much traffic; too many go-go minivan moms; horrible golfing options; etc.

But once you take the harried school grind out of the equation....the opportunities and sheer beauty of New York come to fore.

Buried In Boxes

Shoot. What day is it today?

Saturday? The moving truck dumped all our stuff here, at my MIL's house, early on Wednesday.

But we've still got a ton of work to do in terms of unpacking and whatnot. You see, this is essentially a full house here we moved into. The MIL emptied out the three bedrooms (and a chunk of her basement and attic) but still a lot of our earthly possessions need to be *managed*.

The movers deposited most of the boxes in the attic and the garage and we are in the process of unpacking them and making decisions: store, replace what's already here, sell, donate, or trash. Even though the boxes were labeled somewhat, we still really have no idea what's in each one until we unwrap all the contents. Heck, they packed the pegs for my shelves in a box (instead of taping them to THE SHELVES!) and I had to waste a back-breaking hour in the steamy attic looking for them. Because until my shelves were up I couldn't unpack my books or pictures that adorn them - like a butterfly effect.

Anyways, we're over the hump work-wise now, I think. Although we still have a ton of little things to do: change license plates, drivers' licenses, get train parking stickers, join the local homeschool group, register my son with the local school administration (for homeschooling), get FiOS,....and defibrillate my MIL!

People say that moving is a PIA or that it's hard work.

Of course I disagree somewhat. Sure it's disruptive, but we would all benefit from more disruption in our soft daily existences. It's therapeutic to purge material belongings; and it's healthy to be forced to rebuild one's social network once in a while. This will be my sixth abode in the past nine years (Philly to Brooklyn to Charlotte to Newton(MA)to South Shore(MA)to Long Island). Almost every move was a non-mistake; each one took me to a superior place for that particular time in my life (though Newton, MA is firmly entrenched in last place!). Long Island is a place I've long loathed for its traffic, lack of golf, steep prices, shallow people, and what I perceived as a ludicrous go-go mentality. If one had told me, even a year ago, that I'd be voluntarily moving here AND that I'd be extremely excited about doing so I'd brand them a Moron.

But it's all true and genuine - my enthusiasm.

So where exactly did I move?

Well, I'm on the border of Port Washington and Manhasset. That's the north shore, just a couple towns removed from Queens. Bill O'Reilly lives right down the street (on the water, I believe) and old pal Barry Ritholtz lives just one town over!

Maybe Barry will hire me to tutor his litter!?

Many Were Slaughtered Right On The Beach!

My 12 days of eviction limbo are finally over.

Tomorrow is D-Day.

Tomorrow I pack up the car, drive down to Long Island, AND officially move in with my MIL!!!

And no doubt many of y'all thought living under the authority of my former landlord was crazy, if not somewhat Moronic...

Though surely her friends are exclaiming:

What? You're letting your SIL move in with you?....In no time he'll be badgering you about alleged clutter and expired food! He'll probably even try to get you to clean off the kitchen counters....And he'll most definitely try to secretly dispose of your phonograph and your extra, perfectly functional Zenith TVs. Are you out of your mind? ARE YOU CRAZY???

Moving Now

Packers came today. It took the three of them only 5 hours to pack up our meager possessions.

They load the truck tomorrow morning; we stay with friends in Milton tomorrow night; vacation with at my parents' house in Worcester for a week; come back to the South Shore (hotel) for my daughter's dance recital next weekend; then it's off to our new life on Long Island.

So obviously I'm going to be a little busy for the next 10 days. But I will have my laptop and I will still be blogging a bit.

Mean Obscurantist Parents!

So it's all but a done deal that we are moving to Long Island.

We most certainly HAVE NOT told our children - the 5.42 year old Prince and the 3.85 year old Princess yet.

Why exactly should we?

They certainly aren't old enough to warrant *full disclosure*.

And I don't need to deal with any more tears than I get from them on an everyday basis. They'll find out at the last minute and without any dramatic delivery. It'll be presented as *matter of fact* and *of necessity*. There may be a fib in there if need be - I might say it's *just for a little while*.

I really can't stand these parents who baby their babies but then ask them their opinion on stuff that, quite frankly, 4 year olds don't get a vote on.

The only time to really complain about a move is AFTER it takes place. And only AFTER the new home has been given a fair shot. If it pales in comparison then yeah, anyone and everyone can legitimately cry out, "WE SHOULD NEVER HAVE LEFT!"

Not for anything, forget my little brats, I have my own tears to manage. My 2.70 years here on Boston's South Shore have seriously been the happiest of my life.

And now I'm moving in my with MIL!!! To Long Island, a golfing wasteland!!!



At least I know I'll eat well....and bars are open until 4am.

Side Note - We are actually heading down to Grandma's (my MIL) house tomorrow for a visit and to throw out 3/4 of her stuff in a dumpster that we secretly ordered. I told the kids yesterday that we were going to see their grandmother in New York and my little angel offered this:

PrincessC-Nut - Are we going to the house with the pool? (the summer house)

Dad - No. To the other one.

PrincessC-Nut - Ahhhhhh....I hate that one.

Dad - [gulp] Why?

PrincessC-Nut - I hate that one. IT'S BORING.

Next Stop...Atlanta?

Early this morning my wife informed me that her *name* was bandied about for a possible job, with a different firm in Atlanta, Georgia.

The instantaneous thought of:

Moving out of Massachusetts...

To a much warmed state...

With *affordable* McMansions...

In a much better homeschooling environment...

And a 12-month golf season...

Was like seeing a mirage in the desert!



Of course, we'd only go there if, not getting ahead of ourselves, she was offered the job, it was palatable, AND it came with a sufficient raise.

But still, allow a depressed Ma$$hole to dream a little, will ya?

Y'all have your scratch tickets...

Next Landing Spot?

Do any of y'all know anything about Yardley, Pennsylvania?

I can see the basics - that it's commutable to Manhattan and Philadelphia; that it's a suburb of Trenton; that homes are cheaper, nicer, and bigger than my neck of Massachusetts.

But I'd like to find out more. How many Morons are there? Is it too boring? Did anyone have a roommate from there? Any scuttlebutt would do.

Mrs. C-Nut asked me why the bleep I was researching Yardley last night on the computer, given the only 20% chance that we will have to move right now.

Well, my answer was this:

We wasted two full years in abominable Chestnut Hill (Mass) before finding the oasis of the South Shore...

Hazards Of Being Helpful

Story about a *friend-of-a-friend*.

She was moving from one apartment to another. Her parents were enlisted to help. The three of them *moved* her bed which uncovered underneath it a, well, a device of *personal stimulation*.

She was mortified - as her parents were.

THOUGH, from their perspective it had to be a whole lot better than finding a large box of .....

Small Car Drivers Have No Friends

I always laugh at people *who need bigger cars*. I assume this guy didn't have to go too far.

You know, in the Northeast, when you rent a house, condo, or apartment the appliances are always *included*.

I was shocked to find out that in the rest of the country (if this is indeed true) renters have to provide their own appliances - at least the refrigerator and the washer/dryer - from place to place.

I get it. It makes sense as houses are usually newer, have less stairs, and are bigger in fly-over country. The burden isn't quite what it seems to because itinerant renters presumably have a lot more friends and family members with pick-up trucks to borrow.

Apparently except for this guy.

I Have To Brag

I just rented a house in the small town on the South Shore of Boston. There are only about 7,000 residents in this tony town. Tony, because, let's just say that in the ten pages of real estate listings here for sale, by page three they are already over $1,000,000.

Oops. I just re-checked that. Now million dollar homes start on page four. Darn that sliding real estate market!

Anyway, since last Friday when I pulled the moving truck up to my new abode, I have literally been walking on water. Obviously, we knew this new rental house was nice, otherwise we wouldn't have even considered it, but we really had no idea how great it was until we got settled in.

I am going to list its attributes:

• 2,175 square feet, 3 bedrooms, 2.5 baths.
• An expansive two-zone driveway with a glass basketball hoop.
• Brand new modern kitchen, granite counter tops, island, bar, two sinks, high-end GE appliances, wine cooler. Double sinks with disposals. A trash compacter. Cathedral ceiling.
• Recessed lighting and dimmer switches in every room of the house. No need for lamps!
• Hardwood floors throughout - except in the two kids' bedrooms upstairs.
• 13 skylights!
• Master suite with its own bathroom. The shower has 6 nozzles shooting water from all directions. Large jacuzzi tub. Ornate, high-end stone tiling throughout. (No bidet.)
• Also the master is enormous - large enough to accommodate my office, exercise machine, and it has French doors going out to the deck. The closets are also "California" in design.
• The washer and dryer are almost commercial sized.
• There are speakers wired throughout the house. Just last night I hooked up the stereo and television to it. (Will just use the digital music channels from Comcast.)
• The living room is also massive - large enough to make half of it my kids' playroom. It also has a 100 year-old working fireplace beneath an elegant modern mantel.
• Electric outlets galore - every 5 feet or so.
• The detailing in this house is amazing. Brand new fancy molding throughout. The living room and master suites are sunken. The interior staircase is extra wide. The exterior doors have huge (stained) glass inserts.
• The flow is ingenious. The kids' bedrooms are above the middle of the house, leaving the most important rooms: kitchen, master suite, and living room not only insulated from them (for when we throw loud bashes at night) but also, it allows these rooms to have high ceilings and skylights.

Now for the crowning jewel...

Attached to our kitchen and master suite, overlooking our acre of green grass, we have a 936 square foot deck!!!

That deck is almost twice as big as our old apartment in Brooklyn (519 sq ft).

Of course it has built-in benches, a fireplace, ....

You get the picture by now. This is a "CRIB"! Right down to the cable TV hookup high above the jacuzzi.

Why is the house so nice and so cheap? Well, for one thing the owner, er inexperienced landlord, underpriced his rental. He probably could have gotten $500 more per month than he asked for.

The house is so nice because the owner lived in and renovated the house for himself. He's a mortgage broker who made a ton of money over the last ten years. He told me that in his first year in the business(1996) he made $165,000. Mind you, that was well before the greatest real estate boom even got started. Unfortunately, it appears that he got a little "high on his own supply" and is saddled with too much property and too much debt of his own - hence his house became a rental.

So how did we score this phat pad?

Well, starting in February, when my old landlord told us he wouldn't renew our lease, my wife and I started an EXHAUSTIVE real estate search. We effectively made a 35 minute radius around Boston and considered every single town. First, of course, we looked to buy a house. After a prolonged search, both on the web and in the car (with my two unhappy kids), we ended up bidding on two homes next door in Hingham - with one bid being live right up until we signed our current lease on July 2nd.

Once the first house that we bid on stalled, we were resigned to renting and attacked the rental market with similar gangbuster zeal. By my count, I physically visited rentals in about ten different towns - to say nothing about all the phone calls, emails, brain-picking, and web surfing that consumed all of my precious free time.

It was a long, stressful journey. So if anyone DESERVED to land a house as nice as we got, it was us.

Never mind all the money we will have saved by continuing to rent...

As I mentioned in a previous post, renting for $2,500 per month is financially equivalent to buying a house for around $416k at today's rates. And, as I also noted, this house is worth around $700k on the market today.

Hopefully my family and I are happy in this small coastal community outside of Boston BECAUSE if we don't like it here, we are going to move back to New York. It's not like we found five towns that we think we could call home for the duration. This was it.

There was nothing as brutal as the last six months we spent in residential limbo. This is my fifth home in the last seven years. I am starting to feel like I am in the witness protection program or something.

This place is so nice I hope we can stay here for at least two years and let this real estate market shake out some more.

Moving

Been spending the better part of the last couple of weeks moving to my new RENTAL on the South Shore. I am renting a place that is (theoretically) worth 700k for $2,500 per month. A rental rate of that level is equivalent to buying a house for about 416k - so I ask y'all...why the heck would I buy in today's market when I can rent for 40% cheaper?

Will be back pontificating shortly.

Elevating Craigslist

I am moving 30 miles east to the South Shore at the end of this month. Unlike my last two moves, my wife's employer is not paying for this one. So I am currently scrounging for boxes and will likely rent a truck to move myself.

One can easily spend a few hundred bucks on boxes, that is if you are a Luddite. On Craigslist, there are plenty of ads stating, "Free Moving Boxes". Why is that? Well, if you haven't lived in a decent sized place you might not realize how many boxes a small family can fill up when it moves. Probably the guestimate would be anywhere from 50-100 large boxes. Once you move in, unpacking them is a chore in its own right. You'll be swimming in packing paper and you'll desperately want those cumbersome boxes out of your way.

The thing is, free moving boxes don't last very long - especially not in Boston where everyone is cheap and always on the move. The first few ads I responded to too late. But last night, someone posted an ad for their boxes that "weren't broken down" and here was my response.

Hi—we are close by, on the other side of route 9. I can come take them all—doesn’t matter that they are not broken down. I can come any time that is convenient for you. Call or email anytime. Thanks so much!!!

They contacted me early this morning, I put my two kids in the car, and ran over. The guy told me he had tons of responses and he obviously drafted me because I was nearby and because I implied that I would break them down. When I arrived, there it was, a veritable mountain of boxes piled throughout his three car garage. Utility knife in hand, it still took me a good 45 minutes of frenzied work to remove all the packing paper and flatten the boxes out for transport.

I said to the guy, this is what you call a "intersection of mutual needs". In other words, he needed the boxes removed and I was in the market for low cost moving supplies.

In the pre-Craigslist days, this is a transaction that likely would have never taken place. He'd have thrown out his boxes, I'd have wasted money on new ones, and all sorts of time and energy would have been squandered on unproductive activity.

It almost goes without saying that this is the profound beauty of the internet. The web hasn't just lubricated transactions, it's created whole new markets and efficiencies on everything from buying a stock to finding a date to recycling moving boxes.

The bulls yammer these days about "productivity" and how businesses are increasingly getting more done with less. I never liked how academically nebulous that sounded. I firmly believe that the massive economic expansion since 9/11 is due almost entirely to the internet and the enhanced telecommunication it has facilitated. The way I see it, the internet bubble never really popped; it's still expanding and it never really was a "bubble". It's more a phenomenon, a juggernaut, or an elixir whose point of diminishing return is still nowhere in sight.

The gentleman with the free boxes asked where and why I was moving. In a momentary lapse of tact, I left out the part about my hating his new hometown of Newton - after all, the poor guy just paid probably $1.5 million bones for the house he just moved into.

He and his wife were tangibly ecstatic that I had just cleaned out their garage of that massive mess. The guy also bragged that he sold his Brookline condo on Craigslist in three days back in March, sans broker of course. Understandably, he kept singing the praises of Craigslist.

Guy - The other great part about this (i.e. me taking his boxes) is that we get to save some trees.

I rolled my eyes and said to myself,

"This is precisely why he is moving into Newton and we are running far from it."