Thursday, December 30, 2010

Stealth Insanity?

A couple weeks ago I mentioned the discovery that I was grinding my teeth.

Well I bought that $325 mouth-guard and have been wearing it at night.

Guess's not so bad.

But one thing I've noticed is that it sort of induces me to bite down a lot; it induces me to GRIND MY TEETH.

I've noticed that throughout the day, I keep biting down hard when I do things.

For example, with every jab and toss of the snow shovel yesterday, I would bite down hard. I tried to stop BUT COULD NOT.

It's not only driving me nuts like a long spell of the hiccups, it's got me genuinely worried now. I mean it when I say that I simply cannot stop biting down.

Those freakin' dentists will say that I was probably doing it all along and that I just now noticed. They'll insist that the mouth-guard did not CAUSE me to start chomping down.  Yeah, and birth control does not abet extra-marital relations!

Whatever. For the sake of argument, say they are right. Now how am I going to stop grinding my teeth away to nothing?

Everything I've Googled (and heard from the dentist) said that nocturnal grinding is caused by *psychological* reasons. It must be, right?

I started discussing this with my first wife and she exclaimed that I was indeed incredibly stressed out, even if completely unaware.

And I started thinking...

Yeah, living here for the past 7 months in a cluttered house with my freaking crazy MIL hasn't exactly been a *high chi* event.

Since we moved back to NY, Mrs. C-Nut is almost never home before 8:30pm despite taking the 6:22am or 6:48am train in. So we're both, in a sense, working 14 hour days; me with the kids and her with corporate financial BS.

We endured the hottest summer NY's had in 100 years WITHOUT meaningful air conditioning.

I spent the Fall driving all over Long Island, in typical horrible traffic(!), to *organized* activities for my kids. This was really my first experience as a scurrying parental cab driver - soccer and my son's CCD in the middle of the town's worst intersection, AT RUSH HOUR, have been my driving nemeses. It can take me 17 minutes just to PULL OUT OF THE CHURCH PARKING LOT.

While I did hit a bunch of range balls this year (13,000?), that was pretty much my only recreation. I only got to play 18 holes ONCE in NY since we moved back - even if it was Bethpage.

As I went down the *negatives* list, the argument in favor of stealth insanity really started gaining steam.

My wife added, "IT HAS NOT BEEN FUN, AT ALL, LIVING HERE" and "I've been smoking 5 cigarettes a week..."

What? When?

She's apparently sneaking out at work to smoke with co-workers. I made her quit that disgusting Moronic habit, COMPLETELY, 8 years ago!

And she asserted that she's had even *less vacation* than I have over the past year or so.

Mrs. C-Nut is definitely not in a good place mentally these days.

But I may not be either. Despite my claims to the contrary, I may be a victim of self-delusion on top of everything else.

I've had my share of ups and downs financially and with my broken back over the years...

However, through it all I've always been able to keep my head up, count my blessings, and focus on the future. Hopefully soon my wife's workload will ease; my MIL is moving to her new apartment as I type this, albeit one packed shoebox at a time; and hopefully we'll soon be more settled here on go-go Long Island.

In the meantime, the last thing I need is another health problem to worry about.

I told my wife that I HAVE TO GO TO FLORIDA, NOW. I just have to get in the car and go - figure it out on the road if need be. I could not secure a place in now, much to my first wife's chagrin, I'm considering the more snowbird-friendly Naples, again. Recall that she has an office in Miami so she could spend more time down there. Otherwise she might not see the kids much this month.

Oh yeah, the kids...

Well they haven't been to a park or spent any meaningful time outside in 2 months. In Florida they will be back to daily park trips, swimming, etc.

One of the MAJOR REASON we do in fact homeschool is so that we can snowbird in Florida - so I'll get there one way or another, even if I have to squat at family and friends' houses all over the State, next month.

My wife added,

"It's not just the past 7 months that have been hell....we spent the six months before that fighting with our (scumbag) landlord!"

Indeed. I had almost forgotten about that.

Not at all eager to rehash that nightmare, I'll just post a generic link to my eviction chronicles.


Anonymous said...

c-nut, here's to a happy new year !!!.

I see indications your 2011 will be excellent...with your FL trip, MIL moving out...

also, the economy/stock-market seems to be upbeat about 2011 (lot of analysts +ive)...I think country as a whole will see better 2011 atleast in the beginning(Q1/Q2)...unemployment rate ease, stock market, But by end-Q2/Q3 the Ben's magic powder (QE/stimulus) will run out...inflation/rates etc will pop, volatility may return.

what do u see for 2011 economy/stock-market

Anonymous said...

hey your president lives with MIL, u think u cool/better than him !!!??? :)

Anonymous said...

you used the two magic words in same sentence, that might blacklist your website(at best) and maybe flight-blacklist you(at worst) :)

u can be sure your website will receive higher hits (from the .gov DHS bots that is) :)

CaptiousNut said...

Anon, you are right - and I thought about that.

Will delete and repost now.

CaptiousNut said...

My MIL would @$$assinate Obama if she had the chance.

Though she'd feed him some meatballs first...

I have no idea what the stock market is going to do. It'll probably go down now that I'm hardly short (due to expiration/decay).

Only a fool would wax bullish after a 21 month downtick-less rally even under normal circumstances - never mind with the rotten fundamentals we have today.

*Money printing* has never done anything but implode economies and ignite interest rates throughout history. The idea that this time is different reeks of hubris, ignorance, and outright delusion.

FWIW, I can't count the number of people who've told me *things are picking up* over the past two weeks.

neil said...

what is stealth about your insanity? ;)

Anonymous said...

I think some Botox to your muscles of mastication would ease the tooth grinding, with the minor drawback of excessive drooling, inability to pronounce consonants, and looking like Gomer Pyle. When the three months are up, you may like your new self a lot better

Anne Galivan said... can just get used to the stress and teeth-grinding like I have. Have been grinding my teeth for years...I'm grinding them right now as I write this!

A dentist that I saw about it - this is going back at least 15 years finally said to me, "Well I don't want to pry into your private life but this sounds like stress."

Really? Being married with a houseful of kids and constant money pressure being a single-income family so I can instill our values in our children through home-schooling can actually cause STRESS? Whoda thunk it?

Have fun at the beach CNut!

CaptiousNut said...


You wrote:

Really? Being married with a houseful of kids and constant money pressure being a single-income family so I can instill our values in our children through home-schooling can actually cause STRESS? Whoda thunk it?

Well, how about adding *living with your MIL* into that equation???

I do feel bad for this *whiny* post. I have a lot of supremely positive things in my life. Everyone has their problems. Many others are struggling with an underwater home, bad marriages, difficult children, credit card debt, health issues, unemployment, etc.


You're a doctor. Can you prescribe me some of that Abilify? Or Prozac or something?

Or, can you at least help institutionalize my MIL?

Anonymous said...

You're welcome to stay with us for a few days on your way down. We have guest bedroom with fulll bath, wireless Internet, etc. Pic

CaptiousNut said...

A full bath?

That's good because I've been known to wreck the half-baths - in particular the *windowless* ones.

neil said...

since when did you want meds? If I had a miracle cure for bruxism-I'd give it to myself before you. ;)

happy new year

Anne Galivan said...


No, I don't have my MIL living with me, but I am going through menopause so I figure that is AT LEAST a wash. :P

CaptiousNut said...

I just googled *menopause*...

It sounds positively rough!