Friday, May 15, 2009
Not even 2.5 months into 2009, after an inauspicious start, my *big* brokerage account was up 50% overall.
Now, here I am after this ridiculous short squeeze, down maybe 20% on the year.
One thing that I could theoretically beat myself up with is the fact that I closed out most of my flying positions at the very peak of my account. See - An Aggressive Flattening.
The only problem was, that I started putting those trades back on THE VERY NEXT DAY.
Then, those *trades* turned into long-term *investments*. FAZ and SRS got annihilated...yadda, yadda, yadda....goodbye profits, hello losses.
One of the reasons I got flat back on March 9th was that looking at my profits I figured I could take considerable time off from the grind, do whatever, and still be quite content with the finances. But performance momentum and ego got the better of me - only for about the 50th time though!
March and April were pretty rough months for me. I was seriously sick to my stomach most of the time. I couldn't concentrate on anything. My homeschooling discipline suffered, as did my blog output. Etc.
I generally brag that nobody handles losing money better then me, that no one has more experience at it....as if that's something really worth boasting about.
But I've been through so many ups and downs, been banged up so many times, that at least the body blows aren't new to me. There's a whole bunch of y'all out there who've never lost money (or a job) before, who've never endured any economic hardship, and are snapping at your friends and family members these days. On this matter I'm truly sympathetic; but that still doesn't excuse your behavior.
Anyway, I recently decided that if my account should somehow get back to its old high....that I'll close everything out and take some time off from financial gambling.
What would I do?
Well, while I tremendously enjoy the intellectual challenge of trading, always have, the hollowness of it has started to chafe me.
I've gotten a whole lot more satisfaction out of this blog (1300 posts now!) which I could easily ramp up. I could write a book. Or I could develop and potentially market a homeschool curriculum.
Watching, raising, and educating kids is a full-time endeavor by itself. But I could really generate some productive momentum without the hassle of figuring out which Morons to bet against on Wall Street.
Let's hope I only get the chance to make good (or renege!) on this *deal*.