Thursday, April 08, 2010

Marginalizing Off-Droppers

A couple of weeks ago, IN MARCH, I was at the park on a beautiful afternoon.

I was surrounded by all these shiftless *moms* who were breathlessly yammering about the *summer camp* they were ALL sending their children too.

"But do we get to meet the individual counselor who's watching our....oh, good. I feel so much better..."

My wife laughed at me re-telling this story. She said I had *no clue* and that all the *good camps* were already booked sometime in the winter.

And there was this other *mom* there that I knew. After morning kindergarten, she dropped her kids off at *Su Escuela*, a preschool whose shtick is that it supposedly *teaches Spanish* to kids who well, don't even know English yet. She was killing time at the park, an hour or so, and then had to leave for her third *off-dropping* destination of the day.

CaptiousNut - Where are you going?

OffDropperMom - I have to take them to MyGym (an indoor gymnasium)...

CaptiousNut - What? Are they in a class or something?

OffDropperMom - Yeah.

CaptiousNut - How long is it?

OffDropperMom - 45 minutes.

CaptiousNut - Ouch. That's 25 minutes away from here. What are you going to do while they're at MyGym?

OffDropperMom - I don't know. I'll probably go to Starbucks.

CaptiousNut - Well, it's too bad you have to leave the park when it's so beautiful out and there's so many kids here...

Today after my daughter's ballet class I had to endure more of this *outsourcing* blather. A few *moms* were going on about which *pre-K* program FOR NEXT YEAR was best; which ones have waitlists; which ones were their second choices; etc.

While these broads just sit there, sipping coffee and prattling on and on about strategies to give them more time to.....well, just sit and yap some....I spend that 45 minutes in the adjacent room, reading to and doing algebra with my 5.38 year old son. (And if I'm not doing that, I'm reading a weighty book...)

One of the local community centers nearby is awesome - only it's extremely underutilized. So why is that? Why don't all the parents take their kids there to play, eat lunch, and *socialize*?

They don't take advantage of this wonderful place, not even in the middle of the 5 month winter or during the week-long monsoons because IT'S NOT A DROP-OFF PLACE. And that's all these malpracticing parents are looking for - something nearby that will *relieve* them of their children. For proof I offer this one particular BS *class* they do offer there for off-droppers. On Thursday nights, twenty 5 year olds are shuttled in by slender *moms* in their flattering yoga pants. By my calculation, 90%+ of these children are never EVER at the community center for anything else. While it may be a great place for the kids....the place doesn't allow *mom* to get her tennis, yoga, or shopping in!

I submit that this is off-dropping is a disease; it's just that 97% of parents are afflicted so they haven't a relative clue how sick the mentality is. Sick sheep, that's what they are!

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