Tuesday, March 17, 2009

The Mailman Cometh

Here's what I wrote about my landlord last month:

Now I swear, since our mailman comes like clockwork at 4pm daily, that my landlord has been swinging by to intercept his mail so I wouldn't see *foreclosure notices* and whatnot. (We share a mailbox.) For a Moron who's otherwise all over the place, he sure has promptly been there to retrieve his mail.

Well, it's no longer a hunch. It's recently been proven that this clown landlord of mine simply does not want me to see his mail.

Yesterday, as I got home around 4pm, he was on my property and upon seeing my Earth-scorching SUV he sprinted past right past my moving vehicle to get to the mailbox.

This past Friday, not only he he descend on the mailbox the second it was delivered, his teenage son came by not 15 minutes later to check it. They have a full-family assault going on, apparently.

On Sunday, the mailwoman rang my bell. She had a registered letter for my thievin' landlord that I needed to sign for. I said I'd just put it right back in the mailbox because he'd be by *momentarily*.

She said I know well what you mean, "He's been following me around town, everyday, to each of his three addresses. Many times he's gotten so close that he's *boxed* my truck in."

Now, this Moron's four underwater homes and *8 mortgages* have been known to me since day one.

But as for credit cards, I only suspected that he was robbing those companies as well. At a recent social gathering, I was talking about this crook and casually mentioned, "He's probably got 10 credit cards or something."

Someone there whom I just met added, "He's got well over 10 cards, and they are all loaded up....I know because I work in a bank in which he applied for an *unsecured loan*."

Then the other day I just got another confirmation of this credit fraud. A former colleague of his told me that my landlord had *several hundred thousand* in credit card debt.

Just imagine all the mail, all the phone calls he gets from creditors.

What a system we have where Morons can steal so much money and not end up in jail!

If you haven't already, see my post from yesterday - Give The Morons Some Credit.

Next up, I'll tell y'all how this joker is trying to wrest a rent increase from us. This one's pretty funny.


Anonymous said...

Who is the moron?
This joker you describe has grabbed the money.
Do his creditors have a snowball's chance of recovery?

CaptiousNut said...

If he had invested the money in *hot commodites* or shorted the banks with it and cashed out, then yeah, he'd be the opposite of a Moron.

But he funneled the dough right back into real estate and his *lifestyle*. He wasted the unsecured cash.

Now that he's had more than a taste of the good life, it'll be back to the projects, riding the bus, and punching a time clock - seriously. (That's where he was 10 years ago.)

His kids are pissed. His life-partner of a few years just moved out.

Better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all....

That doesn't have an analog with money, IMO.

Anonymous said...

Had a "little old lady" tell me the other day that she collected the rent from her rental house.... put all the money into a pension buyback she was eligible to receive. They foreclose on the house, she doesn't have to pay taxes on the forgiveness, funds her retirement and the sucker that rents her house is on the street. Now "little old ladies" are robbing us

Anonymous said...

Don't be surprised if your landlord declares bankruptcy and gets to keep major assets (e.g. his primary residence etc).

Seems to me the creditors are the morons -- not that I commend your landlord but he will be the one coming out on top.

CaptiousNut said...

The creditors are obviously clueless, and Moronic.

But those companies are run by clerks disinterested in long-term outcomes. All that mattered was short term revenue growth.

This guy won't keep his house as he can't pay any of the bills - and I mean any of them. He has zero income other than my $2,500 rent payment (on a house mortgaged for $5,600 per month).